I have been a really happy person my whole life, and it has always been easy for me to be happy. However, when I started preparing for my mission, I noticed a change. Things started to get hard. I felt very inadequate and worried that I would not be able to teach the gospel. When I left for school I struggled with having confidence in my testimony. And I was particularly discouraged when, in my missionary preparation class, I felt unprepared to adequately teach the lesson (even though it was my very first time) on basic principles of the gospel!
Luckily I am blessed with an amazing roommate and best friend who buoys me up CONSTANTLY. I know that she will be blessed for listening to my incessant problems and concerns. My friends remind me everyday that the Lord knows me and loves me.
The Lord has also given me the example of loving parents and an older brother who have all served missions, creating a wonderful legacy in our family that I am humbled and honored to continue. My fabulous mother reminds me all the time that discouragement comes of the devil, and the reason that I feel it so strong is because even the adversary knows that I am going to be an effective missionary.
Above all, the Lord is there for me and loves me. He knows what I need to hear. This weekend I had stake conference and one of the most powerful messages I received was from Elder Nattress of the seventy:
One of Satan's most powerful tools is discouragement.
Think about how the adversary views you:
1. You are a literal Child of God.
2. You chose the right in the pre-mortal life when
you chose to follow our Savior, Jesus Christ.
3. You would not stand for unrighteousness.
Satan is going to try to challenge your identity, but he cannot ever take it away. He cannot remove that inherent fact that you are a Child of God who loves you.
It is comforting to know that I have a Savior who knows exactly what I am going through. It is wonderful to have missionary examples in the Book of Mormon, and to know that sometimes they got discouraged too, but that the Lord was there to reassure them:
"Now when our hearts were depressed, and we were about to turn back, behold, the Lord comforted us, and said: Go amongst thy brethren, the Lamanites, and bear with patience thine afflictions, and I will give unto you success."
Alma 26: 27
And that’s all that I have
to do. Press forward with faith, and bear with patience my afflictions,
and the Lord will give unto me success.
Pray always, that you may come off conqueror. (D&C 10:5)
~Hermana Scott